My lash doppleganger Snuffalupagus. Thanks to my new lash extensions, you can see my fringe from SPACE. They're like Snuffalupagus' lashes. BY THE WAY. I just learned his first name is Aloysius. I don't know what's wilder: That he HAS a first name, that I didn't know it, or that it's Aloysius.

How did this all come about? I attended a breakfast sponsored
W magazine a couple months ago. Vice president/publisher
Nina Lawrence and my long-time idol,
W beauty director (formerly of my favorite magazine ever, the now defunct
Jane)
Jane Larkworthy hosted a conference about the tendencies of today's affluent beauty consumer. Beauty Nostradamus Jane predicted that perms will be totally back in a big way (and if you consider a
Brazilian keratin treatment a perm--she's 100% right ALREADY) and that lash extensions will be as ubiquitous as teeth whitening. I've been thinking about this claim since she said it, and realized that I'm moving into a phase of more
permanent beauty. Meaning, I spend more time up front--and potentially more money--BUT. My day-to-day maintenance/upkeep is cut to almost nothing.

Thanks to my new lash extensions, which I got at
JJ Permanent Makeup, I need
NO eye makeup. ZERO. I can, if I'd like, add a bit of liner or shadow, though mascara is rendered totally useless by my Betty Boop
cils. So I've shaved three minutes off my daily makeup routine. Couple that the fact that I no longer have to spend 15 minutes blow-drying my hair, and do you see? I'm free from
beauty Alcatraz. Here's how the process of getting the extensions goes.
You lay on a bed, like getting a facial. My lash technician
May showed me a bunch of lash lengths to choose from. I chose the almost-but-not-quite drag queen length of
12. Naturally, I was scared May would glue my eyelids together. She didn't, of course. I found it a bit odd that she used my forehead as a surface to hold the lashes (I think. Of course, I couldn't see WHAT was resting on my head). She also used tape to tape up my lids to create a more taut surface. It totally reminded me of that
"Tape All Over My Face" skit on
The State. The entire process took about 45 minutes.
I got the lashes after work on Friday and then hit up my friend
Meghan's party later that night. Immediately upon wishing her a happy birthday, I screamed Tourette's style that I'd just gotten lash extensions. "I just got them, too!" she said. How finger-on-the-pulse is this girl? She'd gotten hers at
Ebenezer Eyelash, a salon that apparently everyone and their grandmother is frequenting. It happens to be right near
JJ Permanent Makeup, where I'd gone. At JJ, the first full-set appointment costs $90*. If you go back after two weeks, a refill will set you back $45. If you go back after three weeks, it's $70. Wait longer than that, and you're back up to $90 status. It's a no-frills Koreatown style salon, but given that it's
thisclose to my office and reasonably priced, it's a safe bet that if you're looking to assassinate me, that's a good place to start your search. Looks like I'll be there every few weeks.
JJ Permanent Makeup is located at 316 Fifth Avenue 2nd floor. Call
212-244-2919 to make an appointment.
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*Disclaimer: I paid full price for these bad boys.